Wednesday, 16 December 2009

This Makes No Sense!

I was unfortunate enough to watch The little Polar Bear with my kids this morning. And while they enjoyed the cutesy animations, I found myself nitpicking to the Nth degree about how retarded the plot is, things such as Penguins? At the north pole?, or the fact that the eponymous polar bear at one point floats off on a Iceberg then a barrel and arrives on a tropical island - wait what????!!!

I've since spent the rest of my day musing over retarded children's films, and how they clearly teach our kids about some insane world far divorced from our reality. So without further ado I unveil the

Notjarvis' list of Top Five kids films that contain insultingly stupid plots/devices.....
  1. Barnyard - the film. Where a Male Cow trys to get it on with a female cow and.....Wait What???!!!
  2. Bee movie - Where the Bees have been able to talk to humans all along, but we just haven't realised yet.....
  3. GI Joe - For older kids. At the end of the film the blow up the ice flow which then sinks and kills their base, cos like Ice sinks ya'know?
  4. Ice age 3 - Mammoths running around with dinosaurs. Nuff said.
  5. The little Polar Bear (discussed above).

Any suggestions for more?

God I'm anal about these things...... :lol: